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Sabrina Gauer

Faith, Life & The Journey

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Peace

Fear and Faith

“Jesus said, ‘Don’t be afraid; only believe.'” – Mark 5:36

I learned very quickly in this cancer journey round two that Google is my medical enemy.

The moment I was rediagnosed, I went on a mad search for doctors, holistic cures, and stories of hope. But what I found was a rabbit hole that sucked me deeper and deeper into despair.

Five-year survival rate from first diagnosis. High mortality. Many have tried…few (if any??) have succeeded in living beyond the five years without major risks and complications that came from the “only option” of surgeries, chemo, and radiation.

One late afternoon in early May of this year, before I knew what my plan would be or who would work with me from a medical perspective, I was laying in the hyperbaric oxygen chamber, anxiously waiting for my PET scan results, and doing another frantic search for answers on my phone. When I came out of the chamber, I was so overwhelmed by everything I had read that I could hardly process all the “bad news”.

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Healing Isn’t Particularly Beautiful

“All who have been graciously, sovereignly, compassionately touched by the Savior and received the healing blood of his cross, we can see. Yes we all, like this guy from Bethsaida, have some blurriness of sight. But, don’t look away discouraged. See the Savior touch again. See him dip his finger in the great ocean of his blood and reapply. We are seeing better. We are loving more. This is due to the Savior’s powerful and gracious compassion.” — Erik Raymond

Jesus’ ministry here on earth in human form was short (around 33ish years, to be exact). But a major part of that ministry was physical healing. These miracles weren’t identical — He didn’t have “one perfect way” of healing a person. Just as we are all individuals, His miracles were exactly what that person needed at the exact time and in the exact way they needed it.

There was a blind man who Jesus led away from the crowds, spit in his eyes, laid hands on him, and then asked him if he could see. At first, his sight was blurry, so Jesus laid hands on him again — and his sight was completely restored!

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“So, how much longer?”

“So, when will you be done with treatment?”

A friend on Instagram posted this FAQ she gets when talking to friends or family about her natural and alternative treatments she’s doing for her cancer. Her answer was so spot on, I needed to make a post in agreement and add my own two-cents.

“I told my husband, Mike, I don’t typically know what to reply. He said, “The answer is when you don’t have cancer.” Even then there will always be things I do, including IVC therapy (just less often), to keep my body functioning as properly as possible to keep cancer at bay.

So, the short answer is I won’t be “done with treatment” any time soon. My particular cancer journey isn’t a short one, but that’s ok because Mike and I are trying to make lifestyle & treatment choices for my long term health for a longer term life!” — Jenny, @ShrinkTheMutant

And that’s the BIG picture right there. Making lifestyle and treatment choices for long-term health, for a longer-term life. I LOVE that. So much truth in that statement that resonated with my spirit.

Continue reading ““So, how much longer?””

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