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Sabrina Gauer

Faith, Life & The Journey

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2017: In Review

“There is no passion to be found playing small — in settling for a life that is less than you are capable of living.” – Nelson Mandela

 

A year changes a lot of things.

When you’re in it, you don’t see the subtle things that add up to the big picture, but wow, what a difference a year makes! And one of my favorite things is to write down the significant parts, and compare them to where I was in the past, and see not only how my life keeps moving forward, but also how the Creator’s hand paints a beautiful masterpiece through each moment.

I’m so grateful for this life.

Continue reading “2017: In Review”

2016: In Review

“Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” – Isaiah 40:19

2016 has been a year of so many new beginnings and complete endings.

Looking back on everything, it’s almost a blur of puzzle pieces that fit together perfectly, while others are floating around, still waiting to be connected. And now, with the last week of December almost at a close, I’m reflecting on it all and excitedly peeking into the new year with anticipation.

In the past year:

  • I stepped down from full-time ministry as a career, and have watched God open doors to ministry every day as a way of life
  • Pursued my health and healing through total mind/body/spirit change
  • Discovered so much about myself and about the God I serve- grace and truth above all
  • Was declared stage IV cancer-free by disbelieving doctors after my October PET scan, but more importantly, heard from God in February that “It is FINISHED” and trusted Him through the process of healing my body through alternative medicine and changing my lifestyle to clean eating, essential oils as medicine (and I love to share and educate about them, so contact me for information!), other alternative methods, and true self-care; He is truely faithful to His promises, and loving toward all He has made! (Ps. 145:13) 
  • Began my health coaching certification in September- I will be a certified health coach through the Institute for Integrative Nutrition® and taking clients in 2017! So exciting!
  • Said goodbye to Titan, our family dog for 14 long and happy years 😦
  • Moved from my one bedroom apartment of three years to a cute little home with my sister
  • Got involved with 13thirty Cancer Connect and First Descents; making great friendships and connecting with others who have experienced the same challenges
  • Traveled to Punta Cana, Montana, and Manchester-by-the-Sea (outside of Boston)- hitting my goal of at least two new places a year!
  • Stepped outside of my comfort zone more than a few times (such as whitewater kayaking- WHAT), and watched the amazing changes that happened in myself as a result!

    Lunch break by the river during FD1 Tarkio in August!
    Lunch break by the river during FD1 Tarkio in August!
  • Dreamed big dreams– and set some awesome things in motion that will be revealed in the next few months. The site is still under construction, but keep an eye on updates about Going Rogue Collective!
  • Working at a juice bar and helping others to discover health and healing through real nutrition
  • Saw God work in and bless my family in HUGE ways
  • Pushed my writing to expand its reach, and was published in Cottage Hill Magazine this past November!
  • Experienced the full circle of relationships, both friendship and romantic; seeing how God removed the toxic and strengthened the life-giving. I am so incredibly grateful for the people in my life who are still standing with me.
  • Played a few shows and got back into music and leading worship; an absolute miracle after my surgery
  • Mourned and rejoiced with loved ones who saw amazing blessings this year and experienced hard losses

And a million more things.

It’s been an incredible journey. If I can leave you with anything in this final blog post of 2016, it’s this: Trust in the Lord with ALL of your heart, and don’t rely on yourself to figure it all out or to understand. Commit it all to Him. He will make your paths straight, your footing sure, and your plans succeed when they are fully surrendered to Him. You have no idea what He’s up to for His glory and your good. I’m not going to say that I’ve got it all figured out perfectly, because that’s a big fat lie. But I can’t deny His power and how I’ve seen Him work this year.

Here’s to a new year. Here’s to the crazy awesome ways that God is going to keep working and being faithful. Here’s to new adventures. Here’s to friendship and love. Here’s to the unexpected and the dreams. Here’s to lessons learned and character built.

Here’s to you, 2017. Let’s do this.

Steady As She Goes

“Behold, we consider those blessed who remained steadfast. You have heard of the steadfastness of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful.” – James 5:11

Last year, at this time, as Christmas music played in my apartment and I decorated as much as I could (and rearranged my furniture, with my sister’s help, because I was going stir-crazy!), I was still in a state of shock and trying to comprehend my “new normal”. I was still doing speech therapy, still healing from the surgery, just beginning to eat solid foods and had graduated to gentle chewing, physical therapy, and so much rest.

The future seemed blank. I had no idea how the next year would unfold. There were so many beautiful things still to come…but at that moment, as we pushed my couch to the opposite wall and hung the lights on the tree, I was completely in the dark.

I’m what you might call an “avid journaler”. I figure life out on paper; writing my jumbled thoughts into cohesive sentences, copying down favorite quotes or Bible verses, immortalizing moments in time with ink. It’s a pastime and a habit that I refuse to quit. Being able to lookwalkinthewoods back on situations or circumstances to see how God worked…to realize the truth hidden within the moments…to understand, as best I can, grace and mercy and sovereignty.

Wonder if Job felt the same way?

Job had a life worth being envious of. He was rich, blessed, and famous. He was THE man everyone wished they could be. But on top of that, he was wholly devoted to God. He even secured a whole book in the Bible named after him!

But his life wasn’t without hardship.

When Satan decided to test the waters of Job’s loyalty to the Lord, Job experienced huge losses: his children were killed in a freak storm and his land was completely devastated. But he still remained faithful. So the Enemy attacked him physically, causing chronic pain and illness that drove him to his knees, crying out for answers. As Lysa TerKeurst (Proverbs 31 Ministries) puts it so well, “Satan wants us to believe the lie that if our circumstances fall apart, then so will we.” 

But he never once turned away from God, even when he was laying in the dust, skin covered in boils, and considered cursed by all who knew him.

In the end, Job received the compassion and mercy that James mentions later on in the New Testament. Job’s life was restored, and all that the Enemy had taken was returned to him- at an even greater capacity and blessing than he had before. God had a purpose in the pain, and Job’s suffering was redeemed.

But in the midst of the struggle, although we can read ahead and see how God worked it all out, Job couldn’t see the ending of the story. All he knew was the reality of the moment, and how bleak it all seemed to be.

I’ve been there.

When the reality of the moment seems like gigantic weight that we simply can’t bear much longer, when our bodies betray us with illness or disease, when our finances are making our stomach twist and keeping us awake at night, when the vision or dream has died, when our relationships fail, when we lose the ones we love…there are days we don’t have the strength to keep our head up.

But if our hope is in Christ alone, if we are children of God, if we believe that we have a glorious inheritance waiting for us and the best is yet to come…then we can trust that just as God worked out the future for Job, Esther, Ruth, the children of Israel, Mary (the mother of Jesus), Paul and the early church and countless other stories of His compassion, mercy, and faithfulness…

He’s going to pull through for you too.

It might seem impossible right now, and you might not have a clue about how He’s going to work it all out. But take heart. Stand firm. I know from personal experience, from reading chapters of my own testimony, from studying His Word, that He is just as true to His promises today as He was for those who put their hope in Him thousands of years ago. Our God never changes, never wavers, never fails us.

So this Christmas, as I celebrate in a new home, fully healed, in a completely different place than I was last year, I’m more than confident that the baby in the manger who we sing about (and many times gloss over in the hustle and bustle of the season) is the same Savior and Lord that I serve today. And I know that I can trust His plan and purpose for everything in this life- even when I don’t understand.

I can’t skip ahead to read the end of my story, but I know the One who is writing it. And that His glory is revealed every step of the way.

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